Sit Down Next to Me

At the start of my career, I worked for a headteacher who led a progressive school which had cultivated a fabulous reputation in the area. His leadership style was built upon a small set of principles that were clearly communicated to all staff, and which permeated every aspect of the day-to-day running of the school.  It was, above all else, an approach based upon common sense and grounded in his core values. He had an intuitive style and always seemed to know what to do. Even though some of his methodology was sometimes considered ‘off the wall’, it was hard to question the impact he had. He remains a huge influence on me even to this day, some 40 years later.

One of my earliest memories of working with him was a parents’ meeting for a forthcoming residential visit. Being the enthusiastic, and eager to please, young teacher that I was at the time, I of course volunteered for the vitally important pre-meeting task of putting the chairs out. Everyone who has ever worked in a primary school recognises this job. The multi-purpose halls that house PE, assemblies, lunchtime, concert, and large-scale meetings usually only ever have one set of chairs. They are conveniently stored away in some nearby cupboard and are moved in and out of the storeroom either side of lunchtime and at what often feels like a ridiculously high rate of frequency at other times during the school calendar.

On this particular occasion it was the end of the day, the after-school dance class had finished and when I entered the hall, ready to start, the headteacher had beaten all other volunteers and was putting the chairs out. There he was, jacket off, carefully arranging the rows. When the requisite number of chairs had been placed in position he sat in a selected sample of seats to see how they felt. Putting himself in the place of where the parents would be was a great lesson and demonstrated his attention to detail. He was ensuring there was comfortable leg room, good lines of vision to where he would be addressing parents from and making sure the hall presented well. There were no mixed height chairs, no different colours, all rows were perfectly placed.

He then disappeared off into the cleaner’s cupboard before returning with two polish bottles and a couple of clothes before proceeding to spray the individual chairs and wiping them down. He didn’t have to say anything. I just picked up the spare polish and cloth and copied him. After we had finished he explained that he was cleaning the chairs so the parents wouldn’t possibly be sitting on chairs that had residue food on them from the earlier lunchtime and was making sure the hall looked ‘just right’ and most importantly, looked cared for.

The many messages that that simple action conveyed has never been lost on me. The experienced headteacher knew who he was working for. There was no ‘aloof’, distant approach or any dismissive thoughts about parents. He respected them and indeed, actually really liked them. In return they fully appreciated him.

The simple, easily dismissed theme of chairs provides several insights into parent/school relationships that demonstrate how much we really value them. For this we should start with entrance halls because they are such an easy indicator of how a school presents itself to parents and if they truly respect them or not. I have seen ripped covers in foyer chairs, never a good look, normally accompanied by racks of irrelevant leaflets or poor quality signage. I am in the fortunate position of visiting many schools and there are lots of examples of welcoming entrance halls and cheerful office staff who greet you with a smile. When you walk into the school It is no surprise that in these settings the best education for our pupils is being delivered.

Another easily missed point of detail is when chairs are used for parents’ evenings. When attending these for my own children I was always disappointed if the class teacher was expecting me to speak to them in a meaningful way from the small chair of an infant child. As a six-foot-tall male I can assure you that was never comfortable. If I was working with a seven-year-old child of course I am going to kneel down beside the table, squeeze into a small chair, even perch on the side of the table. But for a discussion with another adult! Really? Surely a suitable sized chair could have been found and carefully placed wherever the meeting was taking place.

I worked at a school once where they decided the task of putting out chairs for sports day was too much of a problem and as a short cut placed a number of PE benches next to the track. No one had thought this through. They were low, cramped and uncomfortable for the adults and just shouted ‘we don’t really want you here’.  The point is, if you are going to have parents in and around the building then at least make them welcome.

I regularly speak to headteachers who reel off the well-used lines around parent partnership and talk with conviction about wanting parents to be ‘on board’. The problem is their actions don’t back this up. Parents being unable to access the office particularly agitates me, especially when ‘safeguarding’ is sanctimoniously put forward as the reason for putting the school is some type of apparent lock down. Of course, we can’t be dismissive of the need to make our children safe but the draconian measures that do not reflect the low level of risk.

Schools should be warm and welcoming. They need to be happy, bright places that provide the right context for pupils to grow and develop. This is best achieved in unison with parents who feel valued. Locking them out doesn’t help in any way.

Parents are our best allies. If they are telling their children that the school is great then the children are more likely to want to come in every day. Parents are also our best advert. Never underestimate the power of word-of-mouth recommendations, particularly in this age of social media where someone’s opinion can be circulated around a wide community and easily accessed. There is often a debate around who are our customers in schools when we talk about a commercial model. Is it the children we are directly working for to develop them as people or is it the parents? In straight forward terms, if we lose parents, we lose children. Parents pay our wages!

Work with parents, they really do want the same thing as us. They just need caring for in the same way as the pupils. So lets start with giving them the right chairs!

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